3 days ago with 26 notes | reblog

My dog Kassie, continuously staring at my other dog Tiny because Tiny is on Kassie’s favorite blanket and won’t move.

Now they are sharing the damn blanket lol.  

  • Child: Hey dad could you please sing a lullaby?
  • Me: *clears throat* cOMIN OUT OF MY CAGE AND I BEEN DOIN JUST FINE GOTTA GOTTA BE DOWN BECAUSE I WANT IT ALL

3 days ago with 6,663 notes | reblog

yellowberet:

ghostmoritz:

yellowberet:

our friend noah

almost got mugged today

they were like “give us your money”

and he literally was like “no thanks?” and WALKED AWAY

and it worked

WHAT THE FUCK????

me and my friend were walking down the street and she had her phone in her back pocket and she felt someone take it and she immediately turned around, grabbed his arm, and said “phone.” and he just gave it back

WEAK-ASS MUGGERS GOD PULL YOURSELVES TOGETHER

(via kevintranadvancedplacement)

xomoriarty:

ok, so today at the daycare that i volunteer at it was ‘princess and superhero’ day and this little boy walked in in this sparkling blue dress and my favorite thing is that none of the kids reacted at all, they just told him he looked pretty and went on with they’re day and that is why children are better than adults

(via kevintranadvancedplacement)

4 days ago with 527,143 notes | reblog

4 days ago with 3,343 notes | reblog

this-slag:

thesassycat:

what if all the scenerios we make up in our head are actually real events happening in an alternative universe and we’re actually connecting with our alternate self’s mind

my alternate self is getting some serious dick 

(Source: thesassycat, via kevintranadvancedplacement)

sherlocksmyth:

sherlocksmyth:

one time my religion teacher who has a monobrow asked me “what the hell did you do to your hair?” because i had a blonde streak through it and i said “what the hell did you do to your eyebrow” and he sent me outside

when i came back in he asked everyone what monotheism was and i said it meant a religion that worshiped one god because mono means one as in monobrow and he sent me out again

(via kevintranadvancedplacement)